Running Thoughts

This morning on my run through the cemetary, I couldn't quite keep my thoughts focused on my breathing or pushing myself to the next level. I thought more about the people I was running past. What kind of life did they live? What were they known most for? Did people like and respect them? How many people grieved them when they were gone? Did they make a difference in the lives of others?

All these questions then steered my thoughts to my own life. I began thinking about those who've had an influence on my life, made a difference to me. My parents have had a tremendous impact on my life, that goes without saying. My dad has had a profound influence on my testimony and seeking to be more righteous, more spiritual, more versed in the scriptures, and having a greater relationship with Jesus Christ. My mom has taught me the importance of service. "Have I done any good in the world today? Have I helped anyone in need? Have I cheered up the sad, and made someone feel glad? If not I have failed indeed." This has been my mom's motto in life. Over the years I have felt so unlike my mom. She can juggle 12 balls in the air at once and make it look easy. I have felt that I did not have that quality. But after my reflection today, I may not be able to juggle 12 balls, but I think I do okay with the amount I can put in the air.

When I die, what are people going to remember me as. I know they won't think wow, she sure was skinny, or was physically strong, or she was an incredible cook. No, I don't think I'll ever run a marathon, I'm not a great cook, I didn't finish college and get a fabulous high paying job after high school. However, I hope that I will be remembered for the service and compassion I have offered others. Cameron and I have always felt that it was important to teach our girls the lost gift of service. From the very beginning, when they could barely talk, we have tried to instill to them how important it is to share what we have with others. We may not be rich with gold or fine things, but we are so richly blessed with the lives that have touched ours.

The other day I was talking to my sister, and trying to teach her a little bit about marriage. The thought occurred to me that you do things for your husband and children, not because they expect it (well perhaps sometimes), but because it makes you feel good to do those things for them because you love them. When you serve someone your feelings for them only grow even more. There are so many in my life that I love and appreciate because they have offered service to me. Some have fixed my mailbox, shoveled my drive-way, weeded my flower beds, mowed my lawns, tended my children, brought countless meals, listened when I needed a friend, cried on my bed or sofa with me. I have been richly blessed by many around me. From these people I have learned to serve. Learned that offering service doesn't always come at a convenient time. I may smell like campfire, but need to take a friends children while she rushes to meet the ambulance at the hospital with her husband. Make a meal even though my cooking sucks. Let my husband go fix and paint a home even though we've had a date planned for weeks and this will clearly interfere.

Anyway, back to my original rambling of thoughts. After my run through the cemetary today, I have felt renewed in making a difference in the lives of others. I don't need to be the skinniest, the fittest, the richest, the most popular, but I do feel that I need to make a difference, so that when I die, people might remeber that somehow, my life touched theirs. Perhaps that I smiled at them, was a friend to them, served them in some capacity or another. After all, we don't get to take our worldly riches with us, only our relationships and reputations. How do you want to be remembered?